Old-fashioned macho man
I’ve recently started seeing a new man and one of the things I like most about him is that he’s an old-fashioned macho dude. He’s a gentleman but not the metro sexual sensitive type and that suits me just fine. He’s also very into sports, particularly football. The other night, he invited me over to his place to watch a match. While I knew this wasn’t going to be a particularly romantic evening, I wasn’t prepared for what happened next. During the game, whenever the referee made a bad decision, he’d yell abuse at the TV, have a go at the opposition players, question their sexuality, and so on. Eventually, his team lost and he spent the whole night sulking. I can understand his disappointment if he was actually playing but this was not the case. Am I making too big a deal of this?
answer:
No, you’re entirely justified in being concerned. However, bear the following in mind. When men identify with a sporting team, it’s no light decision. We share their joys and are pained by their defeats. Those 11 men become an extension of ourselves, their fortunes entwined with our very identity. That would account for the passion of his reactions — but doesn’t excuse them. If he wants to carry on like a petulant child with his equally petulant pals, fine. If he wants to share this experience with you, something has to give. This doesn’t have to take the form of a lecture. Instead, politely refuse to go over the next time a game is on. When he asks why, reply that he became a little full on the last time and you didn’t enjoy yourself as much as you do when other activities are involved. This will get the message across without you having to go into specifics that would make you uncomfortable and embarrass him.
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