Love at first sight
Love at first sight is a myth. How many times have you been drawn like a magnet to a guy who is drop dead gorgeous, only to talk to him and discover he’s self-centered, clueless or lacking in personality? And how many times have you met a guy who didn’t appeal much at first only to find the more you get to know him the more he grows on you.
Though in rare cases people do meet and can’t stop looking at each other - it’s not love, it is attraction. Though many of us feel lust at first sight, love is built on something deeper and stronger. It takes time to build the trust, respect, intimacy and fondness that provides the true foundation for love.
The trouble with the idea of love at first sight is that it creates an expectation that there will be instant fireworks when you meet the perfect person. If that doesn’t happen on a date or while chatting to a guy at a party, many women immediately give up, thinking the relationship could never last.
They feel cheated that they can’t find the man who pushes all their buttons - but in truth those kind of ‘aha’ moments where you feel drawn to someone you barely know are nothing more than excitement combined with nerves and expectation - they are not a reliable indication of compatibility.
The upshot? If you’re waiting to fall head over heels with a stranger, few men will measure up to your fantasy image. But if you get your head out of the clouds and give some of the men around you a chance it’s likely you would find several men who could make you very happy.
On the flip side, I have seen many women end up with men who were totally wrong for them because their strong feelings of attraction completely overrode their judgment. Instead of looking for love at first sight you should be searching for more than attraction and sexual chemistry. It’s important that a partner is a good fit in other areas so look for someone with a good moral code, a sense of self-worth and respect for you.
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