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The number one reason that making the first move is so difficult is that nobody likes getting rejected. So, when picking out a guy to ask, try for a nice one. Somebody who’s been friendly in the past is less likely to turn you down.

If you can’t think of a friend to ask out, pick out someone who interests you, then stand back and watch for any signals he may be sending. Does he seem oblivious to you, or does he return some of your glances? Is he easygoing and approachable, or closed and standoffish? Find somebody with whom you might have something in common. If you like what he says in class or the bands on his T-shirts or the magazines he reads, you’ll have plenty to talk about with him right off the bat.

Simple one is better
Once you muster your courage and approach someone, try to have an idea of what you’ll do together. A rule: The simpler, the better.
There are steps that can help you work up to asking a guy out. Try smiling at him (see if you can hold it for three seconds). Sit next to him at lunch (it’s a free country). Start a conversation (”Oh, are you reading that book? I read it, too. What do you think?”). There’s always the classic “Note in the Locker” approach. And, of course, there’s the telephone. When you call, be sure to have something in mind to talk about— an assignment for class, the soccer game this weekend . . . whatever.

Do not stop
The best part of the first move is being able to admit that you want something and then making it happen. You can talk to somebody, kiss him, touch his hair, grab hold of his hand. You’re allowed to admit that there’s something going on, and that you feel it, too.

Your initiative can even extend into asking him for another date. If you had a great time and you’re wondering why he hasn’t called you, maybe he’s waiting for you to call him.

Rejection
Sometimes they’re going to say no, and it’s going to be embarrassing and depressing. But whenever we ask someone a question, there’s always a chance they won’t give us the answer we want. And there’s nothing to do but try again with someone else.

Related Posts

• signals from him and make the first move
• Should I make the first move

This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007 at 1:43 pm and is filed under Love match. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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love connection, love match