Retired Husband
Gwen’s husband has retired and is at home most of the day and she finds her house is not hers any more. Wherever she goes, he is there, doing things she has already done. But the worst is shopping. Gwen likes to take her time but her husband goes off with the trolley and puts things in it that they cannot afford. She ends up taking most out and he snarls. Gwen cannot adjust to this intrusion in her life and asks what she can do.
Gwen, you may feel that your home is your territory, but it is only so because your husband has been working all these years to pay the bills. It will take time for you both to adjust. Work out a list of activities and chores you both enjoy. Then decide which ones you will share and when you will have time alone.
Answer:
Make adjustments
Both of you have to make adjustments to accommodate each other. Your husband may feel helpless now that he is at a loose end. Discuss your concerns. Perhaps he is bored and feeling useless and needs to get out of the house by becoming involved in local sporting clubs or volunteer work. Perhaps you need to tell him that shopping and other household tasks are what you have been doing and want to continue doing without interference. It is important that he be allowed to participate in the household, and dividing up tasks between you may solve the problem.
Share the load
If your husband is happy getting involved around the home, he should not be denied this pleasure. By sharing the load you will be making your older years more pleasant. Most importantly, find a special interest you can share. Let go of some of your old ways and enjoy this new phase together.
Email This Post
